In less than one year, Chud is out. And so, once again, the Browns post-Week 17 efforts focus on finding a new coach instead of preparing for a playoff game. It’s become an all-too-familiar tradition for Browns fans.
I imagine somewhere in some fancy offices in Berea, a discussion is taking place that goes something like this:
Haslam: No more “up-and-coming” Coordinators. I want a guy that’s been a Head Coach and won!
Banner: Nick Saban still won’t return our calls.
Haslam: Keep trying. Who else ya got?
Lombardi: I think Josh McDaniels would be a great choice.
Haslam: He drafted Timmy, didn’t he? Man I love me some Tebow.
Banner: No Tebow. Let’s get back to the coaches. Please turn your attention to my PowerPoint with detailed analytics of the franchises that have been successful in today’s NFL.
Haslam: Joe, we really need to talk about you and these damned PowerPoints.
Banner: Page 2, Seattle has done a nice job developing Russell Wilson. We should consider their Offensive Coordinator, Darrell Bevell.
Haslam: He’s never coached. Put him on the Maybes.
Banner: Denver’s offense set records. But that was all Manning. Same with New Orleans and Brees.
Lombardi: Carolina was good, but we already raided their last OC.
Banner: Green Bay was nothing special without Rodgers. And the Niners offense regressed this year.
Haslam: What about ex-coaches? Lovie Smith? Ken Whisenhunt? Put them on the list.
Banner: In college, there’s Bill O’Brien. We looked at him last year.
Haslam: How about what’s-his-name from Baylor? Or Malzahn from Auburn. I love me some SEC.
Banner: They’ll probably want to go to Washington or Detroit because they already have QBs.
Haslam: <sigh> Has Saban called back yet?